he must be a bureaucrat - they're the only people who would have enough time to do something like that and the repetetive function tolerance to actually do it
1) Be a surfer dude
2) Be a Brazilian surfer dude
3) Be a Brazilian surfer dude who rescues a drowning surfer babe
4) Be a Brazilian surfer dude who rescues a drowning surfer babe and then surfs the tallest recorded wave (>30m)
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