I'm not a regular poster in this thread because I'm less enthusiastic about music than most people. That's not to say I don't like music. It's just not something that's vitally important in my life.
But since discovering this young bloke, Ren Gill, on YouTube a few weeks ago, I've been blown away by his talent as a musician and his ability to assemble such eloquent lyrics that take the listener on an intensely emotional journey.
To better understand his lyrics, it helps to know something about his background. Some of his material is a bit unsettling because it comes from his experience of spending about a decade of his life seriously ill, both physically and mentally. He was bedridden and in severe pain for some of that time and he thought he was going to die. But all those years of suffering were simply down to being repeatedly mis-diagnosed, and could have been avoided with a correct diagnosis (of Lyme disease) in the first place. Lyme disease is unpleasant enough even with a timely diagnosis, but if left untreated for a decade as in his case, it can be appalling and cause severe life-threatening complications, brain damage and permanent disability. It would be completely understandable if he was bitter and twisted about the combined failures of a series of doctors to figure out what was wrong with him, but he doesn't seem to be.
He shines a light on health issues and failures within the health system. But he does it in a way that doesn't attack or condemn the health system itself or anyone in it. He lays himself bare as a damaged and vulnerable person who's still working through his problems. He allows people to understand how he felt while going through all that, and identify with his plight.
I think what he does is important, and it takes a bit of courage and unselfishness be that open about his own health issues. He gives a voice to people who may be in similar circumstances but are not be able to communicate those feelings themselves as effectively as he does. If that helps anyone deal with their own problems, then he's done a good thing.
Ren's words in this particular song (performed with young woman called Chinchilla) resonate with me because not long ago I spent a year suffering from an excruciatingly painful and chronic nerve condition called trigeminal neuralgia (TN). I was on a whole bunch of nerve block, anti-depressant and psychoactive drugs. The doctors kept throwing drugs at me to dull the pain and anxiety, but they turned me into a zombie. I couldn't function as a human being. Some of you might have noticed that I disappeared from the forum for a while. I eventually had brain surgery to rectify the condition, which was successful, although there's always a possibility of relapse. At least I'm pain-free and off all those bloody drugs now, but I suspect I have some level of PTSD because I don't feel as robust as I did before. The looming possibility that it could come back scares the shit out of me. Having to go through cancer treatment a few years earlier was way less traumatic. TN used to be called the suicide condition or suicide disease before effective treatment was available because the pain is so unbearable that nobody could live with it. If you google "suicide disease" it'll come up with TN. It's one of the most painful conditions known to medical science.
Sorry about the long rave. I got a bit carried away. Here's Ren and Chinchilla with
Chalk Outlines.