This weeks joke

Aussie: "That your dog?"

Kiwi: "Yeah bro"

Aussie: "Mind if I speak to him?'

Kiwi: "Dogs don't talk."

Aussie: "Hey dog, how's it going?"

Dog: "Doing all right."

Kiwi: (look of shock)

Aussie: "Is this your owner?" (Pointing at the Kiwi)

Dog: "Yep."

Aussie: "How's he treating ya?"

Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the park a couple of times a week to play."

Kiwi: (Look of total disbelief!

Aussie: "Mind if I talk to your horse?" Kiwi: "Chur bro, but horses don't talk." Aussie: "Hey horse how's it going?"

Horse: "Cool.!'

Kiwi: (Extreme look of shock!)

Aussie: "Is this your owner?" (Pointing to the Kiwi)

Horse: "Yep."

Aussie: "How's he treating ya?"

Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking, he rides me, brushes me down often and keeps me in a nice stable to protect me from the weather."

Kiwi: (Look of total amazement!)

Aussie: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?

Kiwi: "That sheep's a bloody liar!!"
 
Not really a joke, but I saw this early Monday morning in Temple Bar Dublin. I hope it was the whole weekend and not just Sundays consumption! Kegs stacked three high and two deep, at least 100. IMG_0891.jpeg
 
A young girl about to go on a 1st date with her boyfriend was being tutored by her grandma.
"He will try to kiss you, allow him.
He will try to cuddle you, allow him.
He will try to lay you down & get on top of you, don't allow him."
The girl asked, "Grandma, why?"
Grandma said, "Because if you do that, you have allowed him to disgrace you & all your family."
Girl said, "okay" & left on her date.
Several hours later she returned and grandma asked, "How did it go?"
Girl said, "Exactly as you said...; except when he laid me down & tried to disgrace our family...!
I turned him over, got on top of him & disgraced his family...!!!"
Grandma fainted!!
😂
🤣
 
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