This weeks joke
- Thread starter chrisk
- Start date
helicopterjim
Hero member
- Location
- near Lone Butte, BC, Canada
Ha! Walks into a bar jokes, my favourite
You don't understand the underlying evilness of "walks into bar" jokes.
helicopterjim
Hero member
- Location
- near Lone Butte, BC, Canada
helicopterjim
Hero member
- Location
- near Lone Butte, BC, Canada
In case that isn't annoying enough ........... read the captioning!
The Sock
Hero member
- Location
- London, England
Would this one suffice?
I'm often surprised how many people don't read what they write.
Andy J
Hero member
- Location
- Isle of Man
That’s not very funny as it’s almost too close to home for me.You don't understand the underlying evilness of "walks into bar" jokes.
Took my lad with me to book a ferry (before online stuff took over speaking to a real person) and left him playing in the kids play area at the Sea Terminal. Booking sorted, I went to retrieve the lad and proceeded to clout a low bar, just above eyeline (I was also looking down which didnt help) on the entry/exit to the play area. The shock of hitting the bar, more than anything else made me stumble and in avoiding a landing on my lad I twisted around and damaged a hamstring where it joins the calf muscle. The injury still plagues me today. And as for the bar, it was totally unnecessary for it to be there!
Even-so, I am tempted to print the cartoon out and stick it up in the workshop, for no more reason than to prove I haven’t completely lost my sense of humour.
helicopterjim
Hero member
- Location
- near Lone Butte, BC, Canada
That’s not very funny as it’s almost too close to home for me.
Took my lad with me to book a ferry (before online stuff took over speaking to a real person) and left him playing in the kids play area at the Sea Terminal. Booking sorted, I went to retrieve the lad and proceeded to clout a low bar, just above eyeline (I was also looking down which didnt help) on the entry/exit to the play area. The shock of hitting the bar, more than anything else made me stumble and in avoiding a landing on my lad I twisted around and damaged a hamstring where it joins the calf muscle. The injury still plagues me today. And as for the bar, it was totally unnecessary for it to be there!
Even-so, I am tempted to print the cartoon out and stick it up in the workshop, for no more reason than to prove I haven’t completely lost my sense of humour.
I promise to keep the laughing on the inside.
Jim
Exmoor beast
Hero member
- Location
- Minehead,Somerset, ENGLAND OF COURSE
If you were to go to a Village people fancy dress party which one would you go as?
For me it would be Construction worker or Bike cop…
Andy
Hero member
- Location
- Auckland, roughly
Give a man a duck and he’ll eat for a day, but teach a man to duck…You don't understand the underlying evilness of "walks into bar" jokes.
helicopterjim
Hero member
- Location
- near Lone Butte, BC, Canada
Andy
Hero member
- Location
- Auckland, roughly
I strongly suggest you stay dressed as a motorcycle mechanic, a lot more respected
helicopterjim
Hero member
- Location
- near Lone Butte, BC, Canada
Exmoor beast
Hero member
- Location
- Minehead,Somerset, ENGLAND OF COURSE
A young bride on her wedding night tells the groom that she has a past she needs to tell him about, he holds her hand and tells her “ We all have a past..”
”I used to be a hooker..” she said head in hands.
” I’m glad you told me, I still love you! Is there anything else?
”For Wigan”
”I used to be a hooker..” she said head in hands.
” I’m glad you told me, I still love you! Is there anything else?
”For Wigan”
helicopterjim
Hero member
- Location
- near Lone Butte, BC, Canada
Andy J
Hero member
- Location
- Isle of Man
Obviously I used to visit the wrong part of Wigan as I don’t recall seeing her. Different story down St Paul’s in Bristol in the 80’s.
Richard 180.S2.81
Senior member
- Location
- North by North West
helicopterjim
Hero member
- Location
- near Lone Butte, BC, Canada
Andy J
Hero member
- Location
- Isle of Man
I’ll buy one as belated birthday present for the wife…
helicopterjim
Hero member
- Location
- near Lone Butte, BC, Canada
An Aussie and a Canadian walk into a bakery in Toowoomba.
The Aussie steals three pastries and slips them in his pocket.
He turns to the Canadian and says "Pretty slick aye bro, the owner didn't even see me!"
Unimpressed the Canadian replies "Typical dishonest Aussie crook ..... I'm going to show you the honest way and get the same result, eh!"
The Canadian calls out to the owner of the shop and says "Hey! I wanna show you a magic trick!"
Intrigued, the owner says "Okay. Show me your trick."
The Canadian asks for a pastry and the owner gives him one. The Canadian promptly eats it!
He asks for another one and eats that one too.
..... and then another which he promptly eats!
By now the owner says "C'mon mate, where's the magic trick?"
The Canadian points to his Aussie friend and says "Check his pocket!"
...... and that's when I got the black eye!
The Aussie steals three pastries and slips them in his pocket.
He turns to the Canadian and says "Pretty slick aye bro, the owner didn't even see me!"
Unimpressed the Canadian replies "Typical dishonest Aussie crook ..... I'm going to show you the honest way and get the same result, eh!"
The Canadian calls out to the owner of the shop and says "Hey! I wanna show you a magic trick!"
Intrigued, the owner says "Okay. Show me your trick."
The Canadian asks for a pastry and the owner gives him one. The Canadian promptly eats it!
He asks for another one and eats that one too.
..... and then another which he promptly eats!
By now the owner says "C'mon mate, where's the magic trick?"
The Canadian points to his Aussie friend and says "Check his pocket!"
...... and that's when I got the black eye!
